Split Your Gut Pilates!

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This Is Hilarious!

Who says Pilates has to be so serious and… an alien language!

This from one of my favorite drop-dead-funny writers, Ashley Scott. A great view of Pilates and all it’s strange terms from a beginner.


On a serious side, what if we as teachers could just stop using all this strange and complicated lingo? What if we made Pilates easy?! What if we made Pilates quick to learn and thus less time-consuming and expensive?!

Ah well then we wouldn’t have such a great laugh as this…

Have fun!

How To Speak Pilates

Seriously, the first time I took a Pilates class I thought, “what the hell are they talking about” and “holy *%$* what was that?!?” I left feeling like I didn’t really know what had just happened OR how I’d survived that insane machine. BUT I felt parts of my body that I literally did not know existed and I liked it!

So, I continued on my Pilates journey and it didn’t take too long for me to understand what the instructor really meant when he referred to my spine as a “two-headed snake”. Turns out- what I initially thought of as a silly ad lib was actually a brilliant way of describing something really complicated, like the human body, to common folk, like me. I’m breaking down some of the lingo you may hear in your next Pilates class and how you can apply it to your workout.

“Get taller through the crown of your head.”

What I’m hearing: You know you want to be taller and wear crowns, princess.
What they’re saying: Lengthen your spine, think about the top of your head reaching for the ceiling.

“Your spine is a two-headed snake.”

What I’m hearing: Penis. Or…double penis??
What they’re saying: Lengthen your spine. Reach your head to the ceiling and tailbone to the ground. Find space between your vertebrae.

“Knee stays over your foot island.”

What I’m hearing: Welcome to Knee Island, your own tropical paradise. Care for a Piña Colada?
What they’re saying: Don’t allow your knees to come in front of your toes. Instead, knees stay over the island of your foot, or the space between the ankle and toes.

“Lift from the base of your pelvic floor.”

What I’m hearing: Blah blah blah, vagina.
What they’re saying: Engage the deep muscles that you would use to stop the flow of urine. Think of a kegel….

For more laughs go to http://thehautemess.com/how-to-speak-pilates/

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